We all find ourselves at times stuck in some place that
feels so far less than what we are destined for… or if we don’t have such high
and lofty ideals about our life as to feel inclined to think we are “destined” for anything,
at the very least we feel we are far under-utilizing our abilities and it’s a
very disheartening place to be in life. That’s where I am right now.
It was a year ago yesterday that the job I LOVED ended due
to funding cuts – teaching GED classes in a special program at the community
college. I’ve pieced together part time
jobs here and there and lived mostly off my savings until I took my current job
last month. So here I am with a college degree and over 20 years of professional
working experience and I’m working in a daycare taking care of four little
toddlers every day – and they are barely toddlers. They are actually “mobile
infants”. Babies who walk but don’t yet talk. (Well… one lil girl does know how
to say NO! to anything you want her to do. lol) It’s one of the most
challenging stages of child development. Working physically harder than any job
I’ve ever had and barely making over minimum wage and it’s not even full time!
It’s humbling to say the least. Among many other negative adjectives.
Frustrating, either insanely stressful or insanely boring, depending on if the
little kiddos are playing nicely at the moment or if two of them are biting or
hitting each other while I’m changing a diaper on another one!
I’ll be honest; it’s been a struggle to have a positive
attitude. To not be bitter each morning that this is the best I have been able
to secure for employment at this time. To not wake up each morning and think:
Seriously? Do I have to do this again? But I believe in having an attitude of
gratitude. Of looking for the good in all situations. So, as I continue to
apply for better positions, I have willed myself each day to be thankful. To
look at it as an honor to go in there and love on these little people each day.
To nurture them and teach them things like how to touch each other GENTLY. A lesson I teach over and over and over.
Every day. So while I am teaching them, I am further developing in myself patience,
perseverance, and gratitude. And as I’m wiping the changing table down for the
12th time in the day and feeling frustrated with the monotony, I
pause inwardly and say to myself: Be faithful in the small things, Brenda…
Today at church, the message was from 1 Samuel 16. It tells
the story of Samuel going to find a new king among the sons of Jesse. The main
idea was that God looks upon the heart, not the outward appearance of man. David
was so much the last person any of them thought would be the one to be
appointed king that when the prophet Samuel was there to check out all of the
sons, they didn’t even bother calling David in to be considered. He was out
tending to the sheep. Oftentimes, there is a message besides the intended one that
jumps out at me personally and today it was this: We know the story. David was
destined to be KING. The writer of the Psalms! But at this particular point in
time, there he was just tending sheep… doing a menial job.
Seeing that in the life of David is very encouraging to me. We
never know when great changes and opportunities are just around the corner. In
the meantime we must simply press on, look for things to be grateful for … and
be faithful in the small things.
